12.07.2008

empathy

I visited the dentist the other day. I absolutely loathe going to the dentist... even moreso than the average person. I think (no, I KNOW) that the most painful experience of my ENTIRE life was when I had my root canal (though pimple popping in Korea would be a close runner-up). And I went with a feeling of anticipated doom, assuming I would have several cavities and have my wisdom teeth taken out. But alas, to my pleasant surprise (or shock would be a better word), the dentist said all I needed was a cleaning.

And as I was sitting there in my dentist chair, my thoughts couldn't help but to wander (as they often do... they should play some music in there or something). I repeatedly told him how sensitive I was with anything involving my teeth (kind of how Rachel Green is like with her eyeballs). Though he probably heard this spiel all the time from wuss patients like myself, I felt he sincerely made an effort to make the experience as painless as possible...I thought to myself that he MUST know what it must feel like to get your teeth cleaned so he must have figured out how to go about it with the least amount of pain. After all, he is a human being that responds and reacts to pain similarly to myself.

That got me thinking... about how nonchalant we are to killing ants, spiders, etc. Even animals (for food or when we unexpectedly run them over). I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that we see them as being on the lower tiers of this ideological hierarchy. We can't empathize with bugs. As much as I try to imagine (with the help of lovely Pixar films and Bernard Werber books), I can't really see them having minds, souls, and emotions. They are almost like inanimate objects to me so far below "our kind," that their suffering means pretty much nothing to me. Now you see why I would never be a vegetarian (at least for reasons dealing with guilt)... c'mon it's the "circle of life."

That led me to thinking about God. Can he really feel our suffering? I imagine that he sees us in aerial view... we are like ants to him, crawling around like busybodies living our small lives. Does he really know how it feels when a person gets hit by bullet or if a person is going through heartbreak? I guess that's why he sent down Jesus Christ, the man-god or god-man. But if Christ was sinless and pretty much perfect all-over, how could he possibly feel what we feel... the daily temptations we go through, the anger/sadness when we are hurt. Also if God, the father/creator, can empathize with our physical and emotional pain, it boggles my mind how he could knowingly create such a large population of people who will eventually suffer in eternal damnation.

I remember someone telling me that being a "true Christian" involves that leap of faith... to trust that God is good and everything will happen for the good of his people. And that's another thing... only for his people. Maybe I'm thinking too much from a "human" perspective and not enough from a "God" perspective. But I can't help it... I am only human after all.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Its interesting because your using logic and questioning to search for answers to religion. I feel like God can see through your eyes and witness things like that movie being John Malkovich.