rooftops

as the days are just in that tipping point of being chilly but not yet crippling cold, i found myself frequenting our apartment complex rooftop more and more - always in the morning before i head off to work.

i've always had a romantic view of rooftops, which i believe derives from those darn korean dramas.  coworkers with unresolved romantic tension will always go to the rooftops of their office buildings, where they'll have their emotional breakdowns as they sit with their untouched $0.25 vending machine coffee.  as the conversation takes a dark turn, one person (usually the guy?) will stand up abruptly and look towards the horizon as he pours his heart out - isn't that how the show usually goes?

in the past, i wanted to work in a big corporate office and have this kind of secret showdown, but looking at it now - i'm glad this isn't the case.

my rooftop time is usually reserved for quiet reflection or simply to soak in the dewy goodness of the morning. i have to say though going up there and peering at the hustle & bustle of commuters, i can't help but to think of my city (no not manhattan, but long island city). it takes me out of own tiny bubble and recognize that there is bigger world out there (even if it's just my overlooked & forgotten neighborhood).  i find myself lifting up a prayer for this place i've been reluctant to call home -  with its scraggly gangs of high schoolers and loud-spoken ladies handing out am NewYork, desperately trying to hit their quota for the day.

tonight, i decided to take a visit for the first time during the evening.  it's a very different feeling at night. i can see the manhattan skyline and the neighboring high-rises with their staccato of lights.  first, there's sense of calm that comes over me. my second thought is "what a waste of electricity..."  seriously, do they have to keep so many lights on?  i peer inside my next-door office building where there's balloons left over from a birthday (?) party that was probably held earlier that day.  and i look to my right where i see the silhouette of a man sitting on a couch watching the telly.  i look at all the high-rises across the city and wonder if there's people still working in their rooms that serve as a spotlight for a spectator such as myself. there must be, and i'm sure they need prayer too.

we do not know the full significance of our lives.