this bleach is infecting my brain and making me uber-sentimental.

Being away from home makes me cherish my friendships back at home. The other day I was being all whiny and feeling sorry for myself about how I have no one to go to book readings (and other fun events) to and I get emails and texts from friends saying how they would've so gone with me if they weren't millions of miles away. That made me feel all kinds of warm fuzzies.

I miss them too:


I remember when we first started leading small groups, my buddy roy would say, "man if we lead small groups, all our kids are going to hell."

But as God would have it, my girls turned out more than all right. I initially had many reservations about leading a small group... I think my whole life I was conditioned to being taken care of... not being the caretaker. I'm the baby of the family, my close friends are extremely nurturing & protective, and even in my relationships, I was usually the one at the receiving end. But after leading a s.g., I realized the joy of giving (even with the rather limited resources that I have). It's so easy to fall back into that trap of being completely self-centered, always asking yourself, "what can this person do for you?" And I saw myself, especially after graduating college and going into young adulthood, totally going in that direction- only concerned about being fed, but I need to snap out of it.

I'm the least maternal person that I know, but I feel like a proud mama when I think of my girls. It's funny, because they now have their own small group underlings, so in a sense, I'm like a KCM s.g. grandma (yuck~ kind of gross on second thought).

Also, I miss my yellow star flats.